Blue Arrow

Why We Aren’t Having a Gay Wedding

In case you didn’t notice, your photography team is a couple. Brooke and I are happily engaged and going through the same wedding planning process that you are only with one major difference – we are doing a destination wedding. I know, maybe you thought I was going in a different direction with that, but you see, she and I are not having a gay wedding. We aren’t even having a same sex wedding. We are obviously both women and obviously getting married. To us, love is love and a wedding is a wedding. 

When she and I started talking about weddings (other people’s, not ours at the time) she looked me in the eye and said “I hate that people classify them as gay weddings. I would never tell anyone that I was photographing a straight wedding this weekend.”

She was absolutely right. We are very proud of each other as a couple and very supportive of the LGBT+ community. We attend pride, we are socially active, but why do we suddenly have to have everyone classify our wedding as a gay wedding or lesbian wedding? We are getting married for the same reason anyone else wants to – because we are madly in love with each other.

In that moment, when she said that to me, I could see that old soul that her mother talks about. She was so wise, so open right there. 

You can support equal love, support LGBT, and be proud of your relationship without the label. 

Now, as wedding photographers, we do have to add that label or hashtag here and there, but it isn’t for false reasons or advertising. It is entirely to let couples know that we love and support their love stories regardless of gender. A recent study showed that 70% of same sex couples felt more comfortable reaching out to vendors with LGBTQ+ photos and language on their websites. While this may not seem necessary, there was yet another wedding vendor (Gardenia Cinema of Virginia which is still a thriving business) who just in 2018 denied a same sex couple based on that fact alone. It is still an issue. It is still something that we occasionally feel that we have to be transparent about because there are still many sites that when we go to fill something out…it asks us who the groom is. Here is a spoiler for those just tuning in – there is no groom. That is the point.

That being said, if you want someone to photograph any wedding, feel free to contact us knowing that we are open minded and open hearted. We aren’t avoiding the “gay wedding” name in our planning because we are hiding it or ashamed of it. We simply just want to be married. We want to be engaged, in love, and enjoying our life together the exact same that every couple should.

Now, if you’d like to run screaming for the hills – by all means. But if you don’t, stay tuned because our wedding inspiration photos are absolutely stunning and we can’t wait to keep you up to date on those as we fall in love with cakes, flowers, and more.

September 7, 2019

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